Turtle Love
by
Vanessa David ©2012
SETTING: The Rippowam River running
alongside Scalzi Park
AT RISE: There is a
little turtle crying on a rock.
LITTLE
GUY
Ohh… OHHH….. OOOOHHHHH!!!!!! Help me, help me, somebody
please help me! Excuse me! Um, Fish! Fish! Why are we here? Answer me you fish!
BIG
GUY
Fish don’t talk. Not much anyway. They like to keep to
themselves.
LITTLE
GUY
Wow, you’re big!
BIG
GUY
And you’re little. And crying.
LITTLE
GUY
I don’t know why I’m here. I don’t even know where I am.
BIG
GUY
What do you know?
LITTLE
GUY
Well, I know I’m a slider turtle. I know I was born in a pet
shop and then a little boy took me home, and I lived there with him in a tank
in his room for a few years, I think, and then I woke up here! Oh!!! I’m
frightened!
BIG
GUY
Shhh… it’s all going to be okay.
LITTLE
GUY
I don’t understand! How am I going to eat? Who will feed me?
BIG
GUY
I’ll teach you how to feed yourself!
LITTLE
GUY
Are you a slider turtle?
BIG
GUY
No, I’m a painter turtle. I was born here. Lived here on the
river my whole life.
LITTLE
GUY
I didn’t know turtles lived on rivers, I thought we all
lived on fluorescent rocks in glass tanks.
BIG
GUY
Not at all, little man. I am going to show you how the big
turtles live.
BARN
SWALLOW
Who’s this? Who’s this?
BIG
GUY
Hello, Barn Swallow.
BARN
SWALLOW
Hello! Hello!
LITTLE
GUY
Hello! You live in a barn?
BARN
SWALLOW
No. No. I live here!
I live here!
LITTLE
GUY
Turtles and birds living in harmony? That’s wild!
BIG
GUY
Yes it is, little man, yes it is.
BARN
SWALLOW
Ooh! Insects! See you later!
TURTLES
Bye!
LITTLE
GUY
She was nice!
BIG
GUY
Everyone here is nice, well, as long as they’re not predator
or prey.
LITTLE
GUY
Prey?
BIG
GUY
Don’t worry, we’re top of the food chain around here, pretty
much.
LITTLE
GUY
Food chain?
BIG
GUY
Well, we don’t have little boys bringing us food from a pet
shop. We have to catch our own food.
LITTLE
GUY
Catch?
BIG
GUY
Yes, but evolution has played a little joke on us. We can’t
catch food with our tongues like our distant cousins.
LITTLE
GUY
That’s a joke? That’s not funny.
BIG
GUY
Watch and learn. Sit perfectly still. Lull your prey into a
sense of safety. Spot them, zero in on them, watch yourself catching them in
your mind’s eye and then… (BAM)
LITTLE
GUY
WOW!!! Do it again!
BIG
GUY
Okay, but you try too.
LITTLE
GUY
Okay, okay.
BIG
GUY
Sit perfectly still. Lull your prey. Spot them, zero in, see
it in your mind’s eye and then…
LITTLE
GUY
(BAM) MMMMM!!!! I did it! Oh, that was tasty! A
little gamey, but tasty!
BIG
GUY
You’re a quick learner! That’s good! You’ll need to be
street smart.
LITTLE
GUY
Why? There’s no street.
BIG
GUY
The street isn’t that far away. But you’re the new guy.
These animals might give you trouble.
LITTLE
GUY
Really?
BIG
GUY
Everyone’s not as friendly as me. Watch out for the mink.
LITTLE
GUY
Mink?
BIG
GUY
Yeah, she’s a bit snooty. She’ll question your right to be
here at all, but you just tell her you’re my cousin.
LITTLE
GUY
Cool.
BIG
GUY
And watch out for the raccoon, Rocky.
LITTLE
GUY
Rocky raccoon? Like the Beatles?
BIG
GUY
No, the beetles are over there killing that tree.
LITTLE
GUY
You need Yoko.
BIG
GUY
What?
LITTLE
GUY
Never mind.
BIG
GUY
The tree’s not supposed to be here anyway, it’s not native.
These people meant well, but they really didn’t understand what they were doing
when they landscaped this place. There’s a few that come around, though, and
make sure we have the plants and trees and stuff we need to survive. Good people.
Always let them take a picture when they want. Pose as long as you need to.
LITTLE
GUY
Got it.
MINK
Hey! Who are you? Hey! This is my turf. I don’t share it
with little loser turtles.
BIG
GUY
Good morning, Mink. This is my cousin, Slider.
LITTLE
GUY
Hello.
MINK
Hello. I’ll behave myself…for today. But in the future you
better watch your back.
LITTLE
GUY
Can I do that?
BIG
GUY
No.
LITTLE
GUY
Another one of evolutions cruel jokes?
BIG
GUY
I’m afraid so.
LITTLE
GUY
Geez, why didn’t evolution just give me a flat tail, webbed
feet and a duck bill?
BIG
GUY
Someone else got that.
MINK
And I got this beautiful fur coat! Ha! Everyone envies me.
Even the people. They want my coat, but they’ll have to go through me to get
it.
BIG
GUY
Yes, you’re fabulous, we know.
MINK
And don’t you forget it.
BARN
SWALLOW
Go away! Go away! You ate my baby!
MINK
Oh, I did! Barn swallowed it whole! Sure was tasty!
BARN
SWALLOW
How dare you! (Poop!)
MINK
Oh, no you didn’t! Did you just poop on me?
BARN
SWALLOW
I did! I did!
MINK
My coat!
BARN
SWALLOW
And there’s more where that came from. I just ate a whole
swarm of gnats.
MINK
That’s it. I’m getting out of here. You’re all too low-brow
for my tastes.
LITTLE
GUY
It was nice meeting you…I guess.
MINK
I’ll see you later.
LITTLE
GUY
Was that a threat?
BIG
GUY
We’ll stick together, the three of us. We’ve got each
other’s backs.
BARN
SWALLOW
Here she is! Here she is!
LITTLE
GUY
Who?
BIG
GUY
It’s the picture lady. Come on, let’s pose nice for her.
LITTLE
GUY
Oh, okay. Barn Swallow, get on my back.
BARN
SWALLOW
Oh, I like that! That’s comedy.
BIG
GUY
Ready?
ALL
Cheese!
BARBARA
Wonderful. You’re all going on Facebook.
LITTLE
GUY
Oh, no!
BIG
GUY
What?
LITTLE
GUY
What if the little boy sees me and comes back! I kinda like
it here.
BARN
SWALLOW
We got your back! We got your back!
BIG
GUY
Don’t worry. We’re not gonna let anything happen to you.
You’re one of us now.
LITTLE
GUY
Thanks.
BIG
GUY
Come on, whaddaya say we all go over to the rock island and
catch us some insects.
LITTLE
GUY
That sounds great.
BARN
SWALLOW
Last one there is a rotten egg!
BIG
GUY
No fair! You can fly.
LITTLE
GUY
Hey guys! Wait up! I don’t know how to swim!
BLACKOUT
Copyright 2012 Vanessa David - All Rights Reserved
this was so cute! I love this. I can see it animated :)
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