Saturday, August 18, 2012

Turtle Love - a short play


                                                           Turtle Love



                                                by Vanessa David ©2012

                       

                        SETTING: The Rippowam River running alongside Scalzi Park
               

                        AT RISE: There is a little turtle crying on a rock.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Ohh… OHHH….. OOOOHHHHH!!!!!! Help me, help me, somebody please help me! Excuse me! Um, Fish! Fish! Why are we here? Answer me you fish!



                                                            BIG GUY

Fish don’t talk. Not much anyway. They like to keep to themselves.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Wow, you’re big!



                                                            BIG GUY

And you’re little. And crying.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

I don’t know why I’m here. I don’t even know where I am.



                                                            BIG GUY

What do you know?



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Well, I know I’m a slider turtle. I know I was born in a pet shop and then a little boy took me home, and I lived there with him in a tank in his room for a few years, I think, and then I woke up here! Oh!!! I’m frightened!



                                                            BIG GUY

Shhh… it’s all going to be okay.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

I don’t understand! How am I going to eat? Who will feed me?



                                                            BIG GUY

I’ll teach you how to feed yourself!



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Are you a slider turtle?



                                                            BIG GUY

No, I’m a painter turtle. I was born here. Lived here on the river my whole life.


                                                            LITTLE GUY

I didn’t know turtles lived on rivers, I thought we all lived on fluorescent rocks in glass tanks.



                                                            BIG GUY

Not at all, little man. I am going to show you how the big turtles live.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Who’s this? Who’s this?



                                                            BIG GUY

Hello, Barn Swallow.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Hello! Hello!



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Hello! You live in a barn?



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

No. No.  I live here! I live here!



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Turtles and birds living in harmony? That’s wild!



                                                            BIG GUY

Yes it is, little man, yes it is.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Ooh! Insects! See you later!



                                                            TURTLES

Bye!



                                                            LITTLE GUY

She was nice!



                                                            BIG GUY

Everyone here is nice, well, as long as they’re not predator or prey.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Prey?



                                                            BIG GUY

Don’t worry, we’re top of the food chain around here, pretty much.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Food chain?



                                                            BIG GUY

Well, we don’t have little boys bringing us food from a pet shop. We have to catch our own food.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Catch?



                                                            BIG GUY

Yes, but evolution has played a little joke on us. We can’t catch food with our tongues like our distant cousins.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

That’s a joke? That’s not funny.



                                                            BIG GUY

Watch and learn. Sit perfectly still. Lull your prey into a sense of safety. Spot them, zero in on them, watch yourself catching them in your mind’s eye and then… (BAM)



                                                            LITTLE GUY

WOW!!! Do it again!



                                                            BIG GUY

Okay, but you try too.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Okay, okay.



                                                            BIG GUY

Sit perfectly still. Lull your prey. Spot them, zero in, see it in your mind’s eye and then…



                                                            LITTLE GUY

(BAM)  MMMMM!!!! I did it! Oh, that was tasty! A little gamey, but tasty!



                                                            BIG GUY

You’re a quick learner! That’s good! You’ll need to be street smart.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Why? There’s no street.



                                                            BIG GUY

The street isn’t that far away. But you’re the new guy. These animals might give you trouble.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Really?



                                                            BIG GUY

Everyone’s not as friendly as me. Watch out for the mink.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Mink?



                                                            BIG GUY

Yeah, she’s a bit snooty. She’ll question your right to be here at all, but you just tell her you’re my cousin.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Cool.



                                                            BIG GUY

And watch out for the raccoon, Rocky.

                       

                                                            LITTLE GUY

Rocky raccoon? Like the Beatles?



                                                            BIG GUY

No, the beetles are over there killing that tree.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

You need Yoko.



                                                            BIG GUY

What?



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Never mind.



                                                            BIG GUY

The tree’s not supposed to be here anyway, it’s not native. These people meant well, but they really didn’t understand what they were doing when they landscaped this place. There’s a few that come around, though, and make sure we have the plants and trees and stuff we need to survive. Good people. Always let them take a picture when they want. Pose as long as you need to.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Got it.



                                                            MINK

Hey! Who are you? Hey! This is my turf. I don’t share it with little loser turtles.



                                                            BIG GUY

Good morning, Mink. This is my cousin, Slider.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Hello.



                                                            MINK

Hello. I’ll behave myself…for today. But in the future you better watch your back.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Can I do that?



                                                            BIG GUY

No.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Another one of evolutions cruel jokes?



                                                            BIG GUY

I’m afraid so.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Geez, why didn’t evolution just give me a flat tail, webbed feet and a duck bill?



                                                            BIG GUY

Someone else got that.



                                                            MINK

And I got this beautiful fur coat! Ha! Everyone envies me. Even the people. They want my coat, but they’ll have to go through me to get it.



                                                            BIG GUY

Yes, you’re fabulous, we know.



                                                            MINK

And don’t you forget it.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Go away! Go away! You ate my baby!



                                                            MINK

Oh, I did! Barn swallowed it whole! Sure was tasty!



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

How dare you! (Poop!)



                                                            MINK

Oh, no you didn’t! Did you just poop on me?



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

I did! I did!



                                                            MINK

My coat!



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

And there’s more where that came from. I just ate a whole swarm of gnats.



                                                            MINK

That’s it. I’m getting out of here. You’re all too low-brow for my tastes.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

It was nice meeting you…I guess.



                                                            MINK

I’ll see you later.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Was that a threat?



                                                            BIG GUY

We’ll stick together, the three of us. We’ve got each other’s backs.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Here she is! Here she is!



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Who?



                                                            BIG GUY

It’s the picture lady. Come on, let’s pose nice for her.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Oh, okay. Barn Swallow, get on my back.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Oh, I like that! That’s comedy.



                                                            BIG GUY

Ready?





                                                            ALL

Cheese!



                                                            BARBARA

Wonderful. You’re all going on Facebook.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Oh, no!



                                                            BIG GUY

What?



                                                            LITTLE GUY

What if the little boy sees me and comes back! I kinda like it here.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

We got your back! We got your back!



                                                            BIG GUY

Don’t worry. We’re not gonna let anything happen to you. You’re one of us now.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Thanks.



                                                            BIG GUY

Come on, whaddaya say we all go over to the rock island and catch us some insects.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

That sounds great.



                                                            BARN SWALLOW

Last one there is a rotten egg!



                                                            BIG GUY

No fair! You can fly.



                                                            LITTLE GUY

Hey guys! Wait up! I don’t know how to swim!



BLACKOUT



Copyright 2012 Vanessa David - All Rights Reserved

1 comment:

  1. this was so cute! I love this. I can see it animated :)

    ReplyDelete